Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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