508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
