yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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