if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
