I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize