I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize