So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
