fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
