I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
