I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
It's blow job season.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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