It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
id be glad to
oh god the rape fog is back!
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
