bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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