We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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