Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
