As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
