I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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