after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
