And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
