then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
