A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
