It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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