sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize