My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
