Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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