I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
