I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
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