In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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