I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
