I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
