Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
