He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
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