Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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