problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
