Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
