He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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