The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
