you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
She told me I should be a condom model.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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