Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize