Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize