I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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