i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
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