Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
