I look better un-naked...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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