PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
