Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
