You're completely useless in the revolution.
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
