im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
