My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
