a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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