between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
